There’s no way to sugarcoat rejection.
They suck.
99 times out of 100 you receive a form letter, with an impersonal touch that—regardless of intention—gives one a feeling that he (or she) is on the same level as an unflushed toilet.
“I couldn’t quite connect.”
“Not for me.”
“Blah blah blah…” You get the idea.
Once in a while, or rather, once in a January blood-moon, you get rejected in such a pleasant, comical way, you really have to giggle. This happened to me today.
See below:
Dear Christopher,
Thank you for the query but having never read Cloud Atlas or any of your other comparable titles, and not a sci-fi person in general, I’m just so not the right agent for this project.
Wishing you the best of luck.
~The agent who shall not be named.
I laughed, agreed, and replied with a thanks. It’s a shame, really, she’s got the sense of humor I’d so relate to.
Ah well, it’s that cake and eat it thing. Neither is good for a diabetic writer.
There, I wrote a short blog.